Found on Craigslist York

It's been far, far too long. In recent months, Craigslist has really made an effort to crack down on the filthy, loopy and occasionally macabre nature of its content. It has made the site far, far more usable than it ever was before. It's also gotten rid of a lot of the awesome stuff that made "Found on Craigslist Harrisburg" so much fun. Thankfully, since the last time we did this, Spotobe has begun to cover a larger area, opening up exciting new worlds. New worlds like Lancaster. And York. Boilerplate and some White Rose weirdness to follow.

"In addition to having tons of valuable information, Craigslist has some absurd, creepy and downright filthy stuff. Their "best-of-craigslist" section has become legendary, so while I was surfing around today, I decided to collect some of the, er, more interesting posts from the York area (completely dirty ones aside) below. I have not edited any of these at all, so for the sake of my credibility, I'd like to put a preemptive [sic] out there for the rest of this post. Enjoy."

FOR SALE/BARTER SECTION
Body by Jake Exercise System (New Oxford,PA)
Selling because I have decided to convert my room to a movie room.
No longer use it anyway.
I now use McDonalds Drive thru.

$35.00 CASH or TRADE for something equal in value to that amount. Don’ t really care what it is so email me any kind of offer.

FOR SALE/FREE SECTION
FREE Tellers Safe if you can open it! (York)
So here’s the deal… I have this Teller’s Safe in my basement. It’s one of the old kinds with two draws on top that have a key, and the bottom door that opens with a key + combination. It is not electronic - it’s just a combination lock with a wheel you turn. It’s big and incredibly heavy. It was left there by a deceased relative and it’s locked. I don’t -think- that there’s anything in it, but I’m not sure, and I hate the idea of getting rid of it without being sure.

I have a key that is part of the locking mechanism, as well as a combination which was found inside one of the upper drawers which were unlocked. What I don’t have is the correct combination of RIGHTS/LEFTS to make it work. I’ve tried a lot of variations and the thing just won’t open.

SO! If you’re good with this sort of thing (and I don’t want to know WHY you’re good with this sort of thing) and you can come over here and get this thing open, you can have it for free once I’m convinced that it’s empty.

CREATIVE SERVICES SECTION
Romance Advisor
Hey Are U in a Relationship? Have a girlfriend that you love but don’t know how to keep her passionate? Or maybe there’s a girl u want to ask out but don’t know what to say or how to say it or even when? Well ur in luck! Let me be your romance advisor you can ask me anything and i will go out my way to make sure i have the right solution for ur complication. Give me the oppertunity to help you and you’ll see no relationship has to be hard ever again…

PERSONALS/STRICTLY PLATONIC SECTION
Stripper Needed — M4W
as the title says, during the day would be best since im off work

FOR SALE/WANTED SPORTING GOODS
Mark Martin NASCAR Signature Limited Edition Fishing Lure - $8 (Dover)
This is an unopened Valvoline Fuel System Treatment including a Mark Martin signature limited edition Rapala lure. These are very hard to find.

TV/FILM/VIDEO/RADIO JOBS
Ticklish? (Baltimore)
PLZTICKLE Productions will be interviewing and screen testing amateur ticklish lady-next-door type actresses 25-45 for a new project.
For information, send an e-mail with photo to . Don’t delay, send that email today
Interviews / screen tests Scheduled for the third week in December.
As a Christmas present, Anyone doing a screent test in December will be paid a bonus.

MISSED CONNECTIONS SECTION
I said hi and you smiled at me in front of the wig store — M4M – 34 (galleria mall)
Cute guy with earring, you had a nice smile, email me a description what I looked like so I know it’s you.